When Things Fall Apart: Finding Steadiness in the Storm

Welcome to MindfulMornings!

Today, we're exploring wisdom from Pema Chödrön's profound book When Things Fall Apart*. Sometimes life throws us curveballs that leave us feeling lost or overwhelmed. Whether you're navigating a major life change, dealing with loss, or simply feeling unsettled by uncertainty, today's newsletter offers gentle guidance for finding your center again.

Today you'll learn about:

• How to See Your Emotions as Passing Weather

• Gaining Insights from Small Setbacks to Learn, Heal, and Build Resilience

You might also enjoy our latest blog post: How to Create Your Own "Happiness Rituals": 5 Simple Morning Practices That Boost Joy All Day

Here are 2 quotes, 2 tips, and 1 question to help you navigate challenging times with grace...

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2 Quotes

1. "You are the sky. Everything else – it's just the weather." - Pema Chödrön
   

    

2. "We think that the point is to pass the test or overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don't really get solved. They come together and they fall apart."- Pema Chödrön

2 Tips

1) Befriend the "Weather" of Your Emotions

Why:
When difficult emotions storm through us, we often feel like we are the storm. We say "I am angry" or "I am heartbroken" as if these feelings define our entire being. But emotions are actually more like weather patterns moving through the vast sky of who we are. They arrive, they shift, they pass.

Understanding this difference transforms how we experience tough times. Instead of being swept away by every emotional gust, we can learn to observe our feelings with gentle curiosity. This doesn't make the emotions disappear, but it does give us breathing room. We become the steady sky watching clouds pass by, rather than being tossed around by every storm.

Here's a simple practice to help you see emotions as weather passing through:

1. Create Your Weather Report

   When strong emotions arise, pause and describe them like a meteorologist would:

   • "Heavy rain of sadness moving through right now"

   • “Foggy confusion settling in this morning"

   • Lightning strikes of anger in the chest area"

2. Notice the Landscape

   Just like weather moves across different terrains, emotions show up differently in your body:

   • Where do you feel this emotion? (chest, stomach, shoulders?)

   • What's the sensation? (tight, heavy, fluttery, hot?)

   • Is it moving or staying still?

    

3. Track the Changes

   Set a gentle timer for every hour. When it chimes, do a quick weather check:

   • What's the emotional weather now?

   • Has it shifted from earlier?

   • Can you spot any breaks in the clouds?

    

4. Keep a Weather Journal

   End each day by jotting down your emotional weather patterns. Over time, you'll notice that even the fiercest storms always pass.

Resources to support you:

• Pema Chödrön’s talks on YouTube are excellent for a daily reminder

• Book: Emotional Agility* by Susan David offers practical tools for navigating difficult feelings
  
  

2) Catalog the Small Breakages, Not Just the Big Ones

Why:
We often rush past minor disappointments - lost keys, a missed call, a snippy comment - without a second thought. Over time, these “small breakages” can quietly fill our days with extra tension or sadness. If we only pay attention when everything falls apart in dramatic ways, we miss countless opportunities to learn, heal, and build resilience little by little.

By gently tracking the smaller cracks in your day, you gain insight into your own patterns - where certain feelings get triggered, when old habits resurface, or how you recover after setbacks. This isn’t about dwelling on what’s wrong. It’s about lighting a soft lantern into your daily life, so you can meet yourself with clarity and kindness, instead of judgment. Over time, this mindfulness practice fosters lasting change, deepens self-compassion, and supports healthier habits far beyond your morning routine.

How To Practice:

1. Choose Your Journal:
   Any small notebook or a digital notes app on your phone will do. The tool matters less than your intention to observe.

    

2. Create a Simple Tracking System:
   Each morning, dedicate a page (or section) for tracking. Draw two columns: “Breakage” and “Emotion/Reaction.”

    

3. Notice and Record:
   As your day unfolds, briefly jot down small disruptions - spilled coffee, tense words, missed plans. Include what you felt in the moment (frustration, disappointment, humor) and any reaction you noticed (rushed breath, self-criticism, letting go).

    

4. Reflect and Recognize Patterns:
   At the end of the week, review. Are there breakages that repeat? Where do you show patience? Where do you still feel stuck? Notice - not to judge, but to gently learn.

    

5. Invite Growth:
   Ask, “What needed my attention this week? What’s one small step I might take when this happens again?” Perhaps it’s a deep breath, a kind word to yourself, or asking for help.

Resource:

• Pema Chödrön’s audiobook When Things Fall Apart* (the inspiration for today’s newsletter) includes short guided reflections on noticing everyday suffering and kindness - wonderful for inspiring your journaling sessions.

Gentle Reminder:
Small cracks can teach us far more than we realize. By making room for them, you honor your journey and lay a foundation for deeper peace - one tiny repair at a time.

1 Question

What does 'hope' look, sound, or feel like to you in the midst of chaos?

Remember, life is a constant dance of things coming together and falling apart. Your ability to find peace doesn't depend on everything being perfect - it lives in your capacity to be present with whatever is here now.

We hope these practices bring you comfort and strength as you navigate life's uncertainties.

With gratitude,

MindfulMornings

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